Retirement - A Satire

See if you can seperate out the truth from the frustration. I am expounding on the excesses of time. Remember that I am rather Monkish about many things and Keith is very "laid back" - in so many ways!! I have no friends or close family to "vent" with - so if you want to continue - do so at your own discretion. Hopefully, tomorrow will look all different. But here is today~~

Retirement is so fun!! I know that many envy me! Being off work and with husband being home most of the time is what people spend thier working lives dreaming about! Envy is rampant!!

1. When we (he) bought the new van, he got a maintenance contract to go with it. The van is to be serviced every 3,000 miles or every 3 months. It is already paid for, up front, tidily in the contract (complete with interest) that finances the van. I've been mentioning the need for service since May (or maybe June). Today it made it's trip to the Dealership. It only has 2900 or so miles on it - so it must be ok. Poor Baby, he's so tied up with being RETIRED that he just hasn't had time to take it in. Besides that, he has to be home to help me with the kids.

2. A very sweet resident of the Village passed away recently and we (I) wanted to attend his "Celebration of Life" that was to be held over the weekend. Friday I asked if we could stop at Wally's on the way home from our Visit (since we would be driving directly in front of it) so I could get cards. I wanted one for this occasion as well as a "get well" for a child that will soon be having a minor surgery. AND we needed to get (WIC) milk. (I have to back up here a few days, I went to enroll one of our babies into HeadStart. The bus will not come directly to the Village but to an apartment complex about 3 miles from us. I got the address of the complex - but there are no openings at the school yet. They will call when they have one.) I also have a conversation with myself where I ask if we could get a "specialty" HOME MADE pie from one of the little restaurants nearby, they cost about $1 more than the canned pies at the grocer's "bakery" (they just seem to taste "watery" to me)- or I could just bake something to take. So, anyway I asked to stop at Wally's. We did the visit at the Park, got the kids loaded back into the van, and headed home. I asked why we turned right at an intersection instead of left - I was told that Papa wants to know where the apartment complex is - in case they call soon. So we went down the back roads to home - never got close to Wally's. I had some real trouble sleeping. It just kept going thru my head that I was being totally ignored. Kinda set off - like you do to a 2 year old. So, Saturday morning dawns bright and windy and TIRED and cranky. Mr. Retired heads off to the store absolute first thing, while I fix the kids' breakfast. I'm so spoiled - I never have to leave the house. If Curves would come here . . . . . . So, I finish the breakfast, start laundry, make beds, change clothing, do diapers, and I baked a batch of Turtle Brownies, betc. thinking about Wednesday when I will have my carpal tunnel surgery done - and all that I need to do before I can't do any more (for awhile anyway). Mr. Retired comes home and puts his purchases away. I know this because of the evidence (grocery bags) left on the counters in the kitchen. I see the store bought pie on the stove. I lose it. I cannot believe that NOTHING that I conversed about (evidently all was to myself) ever permeated into anything but the wall. I get over this - evidence of being totally ignored - and Mr. Retired says "the card is over on your computer" - (my computer is a whole other story). SO I find a card that has a Kitty on the front and says "Happy Cat says" - SO I open it to see what Happy Cat says and it says "It will all work out in the end". THIS IS MY SYMPATHY CARD!!!. I'm sick. I'm totally sick to my stomach. I cannot go anywhere. I call the babysitter and tell her I'm sick. I cannot do it. I am at the end of my rope. I turn on a movie. I clean the caca up from the "accident" that happened while she was standing at my elbow telling me that she doesn't need to "potty". I cover my head with the afgan when they want to go 'side, cause I know we have to close the door, 'cause Baby pulls himself up and leans against the screen (and I have visions of it just "popping" off of the tracks and him just going headfirst down the concrete steps) and they (none of them) won't stay 'side with the door closed. They will sit on the top step and scream with snotty noses pressed against the glass until the neighbors come over and ask if there is a problem (ask me how I know that). And if they can't go 'side, they sit on the inside of the door and scream the other way. This weekend I cannot win.

So now I have a huge pecan pie (that isn't even very good) and a worthless card. Our FPA President calls to remind me of a meeting that I need to bring a dessert to - - take a guess at what they are getting!! and it's Sunday. We get all ready, bathed, dressed, and into the car. Pelik is bored before we ever even get to the Church. Boo has taken her shoes and socks off already and Mary is 1/2 out of her carseat. Today has great promise. Already, it's just yesterday in drag.